Forgot all about my Blog spot!

I could probably start all over and no one would ever even know I had a blog spot, but oh well. I just was reading someone else's blog and remembered, hey, I have one of those!

Its been a while. I have been kinda crazy busy, I am hoping to keep up this time. I guess I will just start with today.

Today, I went to a church in Texarkana called the Circle J Cowboy Church. Shain's parents have been attending there for a while and invited me and the kids this morning. I was thrilled. Seriously, I have been aching to attend a church, but Sunday mornings are difficult without Shain. He has to work every Sunday lately so, well...I know lots of Moms probably do it.

The church was really nice, very western and laid back. Almost everyone wore boots and a good majority of the men wore hats. I even wore my boots...but the rest of me was pretty traditional, minus the jeans of course. I even dressed the kids in their jeans and boots, they loved the idea. The music was fun, very western, at times I kinda felt out of place..ok, a lot out of place, but at the same time, I felt like I was in the house of God, so really, I was already a part of these people. After they dismissed the "buckaroos" to their classrooms, I was finally able to appreciate everything around me...no more hanging or slouching children, asking very loudly to use the potty(or "go gucky" as Aimee loudly spoke at one time).

I enjoyed the message, it was meaningful, mostly about how we are the sheep of God's pasture, that we need to come through his narrow gate and allow him to lead us. I like it. I have to say, I still like my Dad's sermon's a bit more(I am not biased or anything =) ). I did really enjoy the company of Shain's parents as well. They helped me a lot when it came to rounding my kids up to board the van and even took us out to lunch which the kids really enjoyed.

After church, I hightailed it home to chunk the kids in their beds, greet the babysitter and head off to a funeral. My dear friend Erica lost her grandmother over the weekend. She was not very old either, they think it must have been a heart attack. Her funeral was the first one I think I have attended since my Mother's 5 years ago. It was harder than I thought it would be. I was glad to hold on to Erica and squeeze her mother tight as well, but as I walked by the open casket, I couldnt help but think of my mother and last time I told her goodbye. I imagined Erica's pain in losing someone who was very close to her, someone who was by herside when her mother wasnt able. I had a rough time holding it all in. I managed to keep it in for about 30 minutes or so during my drive back home...but when I lost reception and couldnt talk to any friends during the drive, I lost it.

At least the pastor who gave the ulogy said some wonderful things. He encouraged us all to draw closer to God and our families during a loss. He said that death comes to all of us whether we are ready or not. Of course these are things I already know. But sometimes you have to hear it again. I know that I am a Christian, I am sure of my salvation, but what I am not sure of is how many people that I have had the opportunity to share with that I have let pass by. How many close friends do I shut up around. It made me think. I am still thinking. God is so good I dont know how on earth it is that I dont just scream it from the rooftop all the time. I have everything I could ever need and so much more than I deserve. I have a beautiful family, a roof over my head and too many other things to list. I am guessing that is something that the Lord is trying to make sure I see. I am opening my eyes. Oh and thank you Lord, for one more day.